I remember when I was much younger (let’s not make me count backwards here), Valentine’s Day was like a HUGE deal for me.
It was my absolute favourite day after Chinese New Year and Christmas. Yes, we Asians value Chinese New Year (CNY) more than Christmas. Because during CNY, we get $$$ that comes in red packets. In Christmas, we only get pretty fairy lights. And presents, of course. But you couldn’t compare presents with money. As a kid, it was much harder to get my bank balance to increase faster than the fats that were gathering upon my thighs. Not to mention, on all my other body parts too! All I got was my school allowance, and that was not much. If only money would multiply as fast as the fats in our bodies. *sigh*
Anyways, I digress.
So, Valentine’s Day was just soooo important because we as girls would get cards, love notes, flowers, chocolates and etc. Now, you see why CNY and red packets of money come in handy – especially for the boys. So, back to my point.
When I was much younger, I used to measure my self-worth as a girl through the number of cards, gifts and flowers I would receive on Valentine’s Day. Never mind about the rest of the calendar year. It’s bloody fucking Valentine’s Day that mattered, because it was THE day of Love. And if it did not happen on Valentine’s Day, then the whole year would suck big time. Yes. Those were my sentiments, oddly enough. *shakes head*
As you can imagine – If I got nothing on bloody fucking Valentine’s Day, it meant that I was worth, well, worse than nothing. I would feel like I was the scum of the earth. And I’d lock myself in my room – sobbing, sulking and whining about why no one liked me. I would even ask my reflection in the mirror why no one wanted me. Needless to say, the day after Valentine’s Day was never pretty. Well, pretty ugly, if you care to put it that way. Especially if the next day was a school day, then it would become the worst day of my life. Because all the other girls would bring their Valentine gifts to school to show everyone else what they got, and who they got it from. Those cows. They just had to rub it in my face.
BUT if I got something, it meant that I was adored. That someone liked me, like really, really liked me! Then little hearts would fly above my head. I would even hear little birdies singing in the background.
AND IF I received a lot of stuff on Valentine’s Day – it meant, I was the coolest and hottest babe on earth. This was when I would imagine wind blowing through my hair in slow-motion, and I’d be sashaying wherever I went. Even if it was just from my bedroom to the kitchen. Yes, my parents and sisters would just roll their eyes whenever they saw me do this with a portable fan, I might add.
Suffice to say, I would let everyone in school KNOW how many gifts I got when I went back to school after Valentine’s Day. It didn’t matter if I had to wait the whole weekend. It was my turn to shine and I’ll be damned if no one knew how much I was adored.
PLEASE bear in mind these were all the delusions of an idiotic 14-year-old girl back in 1983. Oh Crap! Now, you all know how old I really am.
Moving swiftly along …
Looking back now, I was really a dumb kid. I had placed so much importance on the really un-important stuff.
Of course, I am a little wiser now. Yes, emphasis is on a little.
I do not buy into all that commercialised BS of Valentine’s Day.
If there are people who want to express their love on that one day out of an entire year, that’s their choice.
If there are couples who would only shower each other with affection on every February 14th, and ONLY on every February 14th, that’s also their call to make. Who am I to judge? I was a crazy 14-year-old kid who thought Valentine’s Day was the best thing since individually packed mini butter. Yes, I love butter more than bread. So, sue me!
THE TRUTH IS, all of us have held our own silly or even ridiculous ideals until we’ve learnt the lessons, and know better. We’ve been there, done that, bought the t-shirt, and probably burnt it in the end. We all grow up eventually. Well, most of us anyways. *MEOW*
While I no longer celebrate Valentine’s Day in that traditional sense, I do find other ways to express my love and gratitude towards the people around me on that very day. If I were gung-ho, I could very well make every day a day of love and to love. Key operative word here: IF.
In any case, if people can really be motivated or taught to love by dedicating a day to love – more power to that!
At this day and age, when so much is communicated online and so little is left of the personal human touch, we could really use more love and less apathy.
As long as we are reminded to love, and consciously embrace love, may be – just may be – Valentine’s Day could become much more than lovers giving gifts or flowers to one another.
Perhaps, it could also be strangers wishing each other well, and greeting everyone with blessings instead of hate or racism.
It could even be a day to jump-start all other days in prompting us to treat one another with courtesy and mutual respect.
May be, and just may be we could widen the meaning and depth of Valentine’s Day to be all-inclusive. No discrimination of any kind towards anyone – regardless of their race, age, creed, gender or shape and size.
Then may be we could all be a little nicer, kinder and gracious from that one day of love and learn to be more forgiving.
Now, would that be a great Valentine’s Day for all?
You tell me.
All My Love,