Poem: What is SEX to you?

Pic from SMT's Travel Journal

Pic from SMT’s Travel Journal


This Poem is not for everyone. I know, the words used in the poem below are harsh, and even offensive. They are chosen especially to reflect how some men view women and sex. To truly understand why I wrote this poem, please read NO HOLDS BARRED with CINDY GALLOP.


So, you want to know how to please a woman.

You imagine being a sexy lover will win her over.

You think the hunt lies in her tits, her ass and cunt.

You see only salacious body parts without heart.

Sadly, you treat women like your little sluts.

You think sex is about you getting hard

Humping and grinding till you cum?

You think sex is you getting blown

While her head is shoved down below?

You think you are some porn star

Fornicating till you cum in her face?

You think all of this is sex?

Oh, how very wrong you are!

Sex is so much, much more

And you could be so much more

If only you understood a whole lot more.

The number of women you bed

Does not make you a God in bed

It only means she’s willing to spread

Many women have faked in your bed

Just to get you off her instead

You couldn’t even tell tails or head.

Having a dick doesn’t make you a man

Turning the hard-on isn’t the mark of a man

Knowing how to fuck won’t crown you the man

Your manhood isn’t measured by your cock

It is defined by the greatness of your heart,

And the tenderness of your soul.

If you really want to please a woman

Stop looking at your penis for directions

And start looking into your heart for answers

Sex is so much, much more

You could be so much more

And until you learn, you will never know.

You’ll never taste the sweetness that love makes

You’ll never experience the true joy a woman gives

You’ll never enjoy the sublime communion

Because all you have is a vulgar pretense in union.

You could be so much more

You could have so much more

You could be DESIRABLE and GREAT.


This poem is dedicated to Cindy Gallop and her team at MAKELOVENOTPORN for their tireless work in advocating REALWORLDSEX

Being Afraid Is Human, But Staying Afraid Is A Choice.

  • Thom Amundsen
    January 29, 2014

    There is a moment when love making becomes a state of mind, certainly not simply a quest – more a notion of connection that allows each partner to freely explore while receiving pleasure – to such a degree that both people haven’t quite realized who is leading the way!

    • shirleymaya
      January 29, 2014

      Yes, sex is so much much more. It is intimate, intense and sublime when it is done with mutual respect, consent and passion 😉

  • scottishmomus
    January 29, 2014

    So well stated and read, Shirley. x

    • shirleymaya
      January 29, 2014

      Thank you my dearest Soul Sister x

  • A Christian's Musings
    January 29, 2014

    Wow. That is really putting it down the way it is! Very good!

    I will gladly answer the question of the original post title, “What is Sex to You?”

    It transcends physical union. It is a true matching of each person’s soul’s desires when each person’s desire is to please the other on a plane that few people can conceive. That’s my answer.


  • The Hook
    January 29, 2014


    Well done.

    • shirleymaya
      January 30, 2014

      Thank you, Hook. Thank you very much 🙂

  • Lady Monakil
    January 30, 2014

    very well said.you made it straight and beautiful

    • shirleymaya
      January 30, 2014

      Thank you for your kind comments, Lady Monakil 😉

  • kdavisfanclub
    January 30, 2014

    wow, what a piece, Shirley! Hope some can learn from it. Too many mistake lust for love. A selfish lover won’t ‘love’ often.

    • shirleymaya
      January 31, 2014

      Thanks for your kind comments! I couldn’t agree with you more! 🙂

  • Sofia
    February 3, 2014

    Beautifully written.
    I am lucky that I have a man that can treat me as his slut but also respects me as well… That is hard to find — someone who is able to fulfill all parts of me. 🙂

    • shirleymaya
      February 3, 2014

      This is why I enjoy reading your blog! You have the respect and playfulness, the love and trust, above all! It is VERY hard to find someone who fulfills all our parts! So true! Hence, you and JK are so lucky to have each other! Hugs x

      • Sofia
        February 4, 2014

        Thank you my friend…. My wish is that you will find someone that can you give you what you need as well.
        They are out there.
        Hugs back

        • shirleymaya
          February 4, 2014

          Thank you, Sofia. That is so sweet and kind of you 🙂

  • Jacob Mathews
    February 3, 2014

    Amazing how you beautifully made sex so inspiring.

    • shirleymaya
      February 4, 2014

      Sex can be inspiring 🙂

  • Thom Amundsen
    February 20, 2014

    And it returns, continuing the age old dilemma towards defining our purpose – how is it the human condition is so drawn by societal standards that even the very notion of objectifying means a shallow reproach rather than an elegant allowance of delicious beauty.

    October 27, 2014

    Appreciating each other,understanding the needs,respecting each others feelings,making time for each other etc contribute to better relationships.

    • shirleymaya
      October 27, 2014

      Well said, Thaman. Thanks for taking the time to share your thoughts. 🙂

  • dougstuber
    November 21, 2014

    The best part of a loving relationship is accomplishing things as a team. In many cases solid child rearing can be one way, and sometimes it’s volunteering to hand out pens and notebooks so homeless people can write their stories and being at the shelter once a week to see the project through; or founding a non-profit that supports the work of tireless social workers, overworked and sometimes underpaid too. Any couple that lives in the positive realm can teach and DO and work and show the power of love beyond the walls of their home.

    • shirleymaya
      November 24, 2014

      These days, relationships models or platforms are quite complex as every couple design their own. However, as long as it works for them – then, more power to them. What you describe is perhaps the highest form of “service” a couple can give to the world around them. That would be very nice too. 🙂